The number one quality men need above all else to attract women is confidence. Certainly good looks, being in good physical shape and having money doesn’t hurt. On the other hand, having those things likely improves a man’s confidence, thus improving his chances on attracting women. Fortunately for us average or below average looking men, in average or below average shape, and making average or below average money, confidence is more a state mind than a trait entirely dependent on our physical and socio-economic status.

Now don’t get me wrong, making more money and getting into better shape is definitely something every man should pursue but these generally take time, where as increasing your self confidence is something you can begin immediately. The easiest way to do this is by eliminating the negative thoughts that completely stop you from even attempting to try something that you want to do. You want to go talk to that girl, you want to start working out, you want to start your own business but all too often we talk ourselves out of it before even attempting our goal.

Approaching a woman is certainly less risky than starting a business so what really do you have to lose.  Certainly getting rejected sucks, but, it is going to happen. Learning to attract women is a skill, and you will only get better at it with time and practice. All too often getting rejected or failing will lead to the negative thoughts that cause your self-confidence to be low. Get yourself into the “who cares” mindset when it comes to approaching, and also the first initial dates, women and them rejecting you will have no power over you. Say you approach a woman at the bar, strike a bit of conversation for a few minutes, ask her for her number or to go out on a date and she says no. Well, big deal. What have you really lost? You invested a few minutes of your time and hopefully no money by buying her a drink.  What you gained is a conversation, maybe it was awkward but o well, and you gained practice in approaching women. Do a quick recap on how you talked to her and what you could do better, if anything, next time when approaching a woman and then get on with your life.

Do not let the negative thought of “well I just got rejected again, I will probably never get this right” effect your confidence level. You got rejected, who cares? Move on to the next one, there is no shortage of single women, with your confidence level intact. Women can for the most part easily detect a man with low confidence so you are only setting yourself up for future failures if you let the sting of rejection effect your confidence level.  You will never have the kind of success with women you want with low confidence. Improving your self confidence is the first, and by far the most important step in learning how to attract women.